what you feel is what you are

& what you are is beautiful.

its been almost a week since ive blogged. ive had a lot of things to talk about, most likely. but it just wasnt meant to be said on here. it was meant to be said to my bestest friend in the whole wide world. i got to hang out with her yesterday and today and i loved it. summer is cool because we dont have school and all but its kinda sad because we hardly ever get to see each other. we both work, and she works random times, so its hard to get together at times. i had a lot of fun with her, though. she is an awesome friend. :)

im not blogging anything about you. i guess im scared of saying something stupid. since i now know that you read these things. its either that or youre extremely random. and, as random as you are, i believe its the first.

i saw kung fu panda last night. holy cow, it was freaking hilarious! im not gonna lie, i really liked it. it kept me very entertained. and i think if i were to watch it in the middle of the day it would be just as funny as it was at 11 o'clock last night. haha, well, maybe not AS funny. but probably really really close. im going to see it again in the morning. with my parents. im glad they want to go see it because im already dying to see it again.

i played guitar hero on xbox tonight. it was bad. i couldnt even play on hard. at all. not even one song. i think its harder on xbox? is that possible? or have i just gotten worse? ive finally come to the realization that in order to get better at that game im going to have to own it. and thats not something i see in the near future. because im broke. and i will be for quite a while. but, hey, who needs money?!

my computer has absolutely nothing on it. my dad erased all its memory and junk. at least that got rid of the trojans. ha. i was hoping that it wouldnt be able to be fixed so i could get my macbook early... didnt quite work out. but thats okay. ill get it soon enough. i dont want to think about how fast this years gonna go. its definitely bittersweet.

tomorrows the 14th. that means in three months i will technically no longer be a child. thats sad. i like childish things. haha. but im sure growing up will be fun? i know i have an amazing future to look forward to. i dont know where id be without Gods promises. seriously, i would be completely lost, if alive at all. thats not something i want to think about. im just so thankful to know Him. im so thankful to have a family who can trust God with their lives. nothing changes hearts more than actually seeing someone live life with God. talk means nothing. i can talk about God all i want. and sure, people might listen, but what do they get out of it? how is that going to prove to them that a relationship is something they trully want. maybe once they see me living day to day in that relationship then itll click. that somethings different. that theres something more to it. and then, maybe then, theyll get interested. and theyll feel incomplete without being around that complete joy and peace that comes with such a relationship. im so in love with that relationship. im so in love with who God is and what Hes done for not only me, but for my family and friends. i could not imagine my life without Him.

i think my family is poorer than we've ever been. but, we know that we can live without all the luxeries we've been able to afford over the past years. i believe we're happier now more than ever, and we're all so excited about what God has in store. i know i am.

its barely ten o'clock. and im not sure if im tired. but i have to be ready by like 10:30 so i guess i should go on to bed. i hate getting up before i want to. haha.

wow, im lazy.